261-270 Doctors

This page is dedicated to not only to doctors, but all the essential workers.

261.A man tells the operator over the phone that her wife is having a baby NOW. "Is this her first child?" the operator asks. Husband: "No, this is her husband".

262. Why did the Dalmatian go to the eye doctor? Because he kept seeing spots.

263.A man walks into a doctor’s office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear, and a banana in his right ear. “What’s the matter with me?” he asks the doctor. The doctor replies, “You’re not eating properly.”

264.What did the doctor say to the rocket ship? Time to get your booster shot!

265.What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil? Get dressed up — the doctor is taking us out!

266.Why did the mattress go to the doctor? It had spring fever.

267.Why did the rope go to the doctor? It had a knot in its stomach.

268.Patient: Doctor, doctor, I think I am losing my memory! Doctor: When did that happen? Patient: When did what happen?

269.Why did Dracula go to the doctor? He couldn’t stop coffin!

270.Why is a doctor always calm? Because they have a lot of patients.